Category: Friendship

Faith, Family First, Friendship, Kindness, Love, Step Mom

My Step Mom

plantspoliticsandthelord

Do you have that person in your life that shouldn’t be? And by shouldn’t be, I don’t mean it in the way that they are a bad person, one that treats you bad… It was me that was that person. And The person that shouldn’t be there, is my Step Mom. Her name is Linda. I honestly can’t remember when she wasn’t there. She married my biological Dad when I was young. My “real” parents (if you will…) got a divorce when I was 13 months old. I never knew that relationship. With that being said, I still spent time with my “real” Dad and I only remember when Linda was there. They were married for 20 something years and then divorced. I was in college at that time.

After they divorced, he moved on and to a different state and re-married. After that, I’ve seen him twice. Twice… Once after my Son was born and the last time was when my Son was 18 months. My Son is now 21. I’ve seen him twice and have not heard of him or from him, since. As I am a Mother, I think that is weird. But, it’s life. That’s just the way it goes. His wife has died and I did reach out; via a sympathy card. Still haven’t heard from him. Do I need to? Probably not. I just would never not have anything to do with my kiddo. That would never happen. It hurts. But you move on.

My Step Mom, has stood by me. When she shouldn’t have. She has come to the very important events in my life. Not just showed up, but was there. Some things, I’m sure were inconvenient. She was still there. For example – she showed up for my kiddos HS Graduation. It was a big day for my whole family. The closest people, or the ones that should be, couldn’t be there. Privately – that hurt. She was there – for me. She felt like she needed to be there – for ME. I needed her. It still means so much.

I was mean to her when I was a kid. Even as an adult. You know – I knew everything. More than her. Not only was I mean, I was mean to her face. Right in front of her. I look back and hate that part of me.

Linda was the first adult to bring me to a church. She taught me how important the Lord was/is. Church was important. SHE taught me that. Sometimes when I am in Seattle, I still drive by that church. It brings me happiness.

The thing I love the most about her is her simple kindness. I hear from her almost daily. It means so much – I’m 50 and I NEED this. She just gets it. Gets me. She has always been kind – it was me that wasn’t. This is what I see on the daily:

Just the time that she takes; it makes me happy. I’ve never had this – especially as an adult. It just makes me happy.

Thank You, Linda. You make my heart happy. I feel remembered. You could have walked away. You never did. You are the B-E-S-T Step Mom a kid could have ever had.

Love, A

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Faith, Friendship, Kindness, Seabrook, WA, Work-Life-Balance

Friendship 5 | Seabrook, WA | March 2021

plantspoliticsandthelord

I has been a really fun these past few days. You know when you can get away from home and just sit back and relax? With four really good Friends?? Two of them I have known for 15 or more years and two I have known for probably 5 years. They are Friends that hold me up. All of them. All differently. They are all kind hearted; friendly; honest; but most of all they make me laugh. They are funny! We drink a lot of wine. We eat all damn day and night. We all bring goodies – the kind we just don’t eat at home. Double stuffed Oreo’s, Hershey Bars, cookies, cupcakes and more wine.

We are in Seabrook WA. The town is Cape-Cod-ish. It’s my type of place. They ocean is literally right there. Just across the street. The houses are cool. The people are kind. The wine is cheap and the hiking is muddy, just the way I like it. The tree’s are tall. The waves are big. They have a clam cleaning station. The Bakery is beyond divine. There is a Tequila Bar and a stone pizza joint. The down town area is quaint. Cute stores; great smelling candles; shell jewelry; masks… It is just lovely.

We get up in the morning and coffee up and go straight to the ocean. It has rained. It has been sunny. It is where the Lord hears me. Guides, me. Knows, me. Comforts, me. I feel his strength.

If you don’t not have Friends like this – you need to. It’s an extended weekend of Therapy. You need it. Go out and get it.

Faith, Family First, Friendship, Kindness, Love

God’s Got My Back

plantspoliticsandthelord

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Ever had a really crappy week??  You know the one you knew was coming?  You knew it was coming about a year ago?  And if you actually sit back and think about it, you knew it has really been coming for a couple years…??  Well, that was my last week.  It finally came to a head on Friday.  It is Sunday, a new week and the Lord has me moving forward quite graciously.

You know those relationships that are toxic and you can feel the heat.  It feels like fire?  Sometimes you think about it and just give the situation the serious side-eye?  Me!  You know the relationship that hurts not just you – but your kiddo?  That’s when your Momma mode clicks in.  You let it go.  Maybe you want your kid to learn a lesson or two.  When the hurt continues there is a time you say enough, is enough.  That was my last week.

The thing that I am so thankful for is the Lord.  He sooooo had this.  He literally showed me the way.  I felt it every step of the way.  The heaviness  left.  My head quit spinning.  He knew this was coming – obviously, more so than me.  His guidance helped me breathe.  It helped slow me down.  I got focused.  Focused on what is important.  Family is.  MY family.  My Friends.  My growth.

I look back and on this Sunday, I remember the really good things that happened this week.  My husband picked a ton of tomatoes he grew and I am now making spaghetti sauce.  My neighbor begged us to come pick some of her peaches and I just made peach cobbler.  Shared some with one of my Besties and her family.  My house is clean!  The In-Laws come over and we visited outside with dinner that my husband made.  My Son and his GF were both off work and could enjoy the day with us.  The Lord is teaching me what being grounded  means.  I am thankful for that.

I am thankful for this last week | year | last couple of years…   Sometimes learning to leave and move on, is what you need.  God showed me that.  I’m learning how golden it is, just to look the other way and be quiet and pray – a lot. Keeping your thoughts kind and simply saying good bye.  #godsgotmyback

 

A Bonus to this week was – when my In-Laws were here, I asked my MIL where she got her necklace – she said, “Oh, you like it?  You can have it…”  I LOVE it.

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Kindness matters.  Always.

Faith, Friendship

Do You Have THAT Friend?

plantspoliticsandthelord

box-gloves

You should.  You know the one I am talking about?  She’s (He’s) not the one you hang out with a lot.  But she is there.  When you need her.  No.Questions.Asked.  She is that one, that even though you live in the same town, if you do not have contact, she is there.  I found that out this Spring.  I needed her.

I met her several years ago.  At the gym.  She is strong.  Really strong.  In so many ways.  She knew what she was doing.  I did not.  I had been going to the gym after work.  My practical side knew that I should be dragging my ass out of bed before anyone was up, and getting my work-out on so that I could be home after work.  I still had a kiddo home that needed me and dinner.  Getting to the gym by 5am, just seemed so crazy.  I literally could not get up.  I actually tried for a couple of months.  I just couldn’t do it.  My boss did.  A couple of days a week she took a 5am class, at a different gym.  One day I asked her for some advice.  Like, how do I get up??  She explained that yes, it is hard and sucks but make your self do it for 2 weeks.  Suffer and just do it.  Make yourself.  She swore, I would never go back.  I haven’t.    Monday and Tuesday sucked.  By Thursday, I knew 5am was for me.

When I first started coming in at 5am, my Trainer was on vacation.  I would not know anyone.  I was a bit nervous.  Well, kind of scared.  That’s when I met her.  I’m pretty sure she gave me the side eye a few times.  You, know, our gym was tiny at the time and I was taking up space.  Actually probably in her way.  Back in the day at 5am, it was literally this guy -Matt- a bad ass, straight up boxer, my Friend and Me.  Me = the one who didn’t know what the heck I just got myself into.  I had a hard time looking at Matt because I was sure he was thinking – WTH?  Why?  My Friend, I’m pretty sure was thinking the same thing.  At the time I really had no idea what a 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 was.  I couldn’t do leg lifts.  I mean, I could – one leg at a time.  However, after the first week – I decided I was EXACTLY where I was supposed to be.  I tried and just continued to go.  I learned so much being a newbie.

My 5am stint lasted a few years.  Then my Son graduated HS, was working all the time and would be getting ready to go to college.  As things were spinning in my head – I decided I didn’t need to get up early to get to the gym anymore.  THAT was a huge mistake.  I decided I could now just go after work.  Yeah – that really never happened.  I went to classes I liked – when I could.  Which, honestly, wasn’t much.  I lost my normal.  I did it to myself.

Several months into this a lot had happened.  (at some point, maybe I will do a blog post on that…) I was not were I wanted to be.  I gained some weight.  The wick was burning at both ends; I was trying to get it together.  It was then – that I reached out to THAT Friend.  The one I met at the gym.  The one who had meant so much to me, for so long.  The one I did not talk to for months.  She continued to go to the gym at 5am.  Not me!  I texted her.  Asked her to go walk a few miles on the Loop.  I needed her.  I just hoped that she would say yes.  She did.  We met up I was a hot mess.  I literally told her where I had been, what I had been doing.  I had never told anybody any of this.  She listened.  Whole heartedly.  In the time we hadn’t seen each other, a lot had gone on in her life too.  She made me feel as if what I was telling her, was so much more important.  When we were done, I got in my car to leave and bawled my eyes out.  I was so thankful for her.  THAT Friend.

Months later – yes, months – I decide to go back to the gym early.  I was going to start going at 4:30am.  I contacted my Friend and asked if I would see her at 5.  She asked, Why?  She was probably wondering if I was actually going to come back.  I told her I would be there at 4:30, but I would see her when she got there.  Well, guess what?  THAT Friend has showed up at the gym at 4:30am ever since.

Her kindness is what everybody needs.  I love the way she listens.  I love that she always reminds me that the Lord knows the way.  Always.  & don’t second guess that.

Lastly, she started a new thing a couple weeks ago – on our way out of the gym, we look in the mirror, SMILE then fist pump.  That was actually hard.  A week later she added this – say one word that describes you.  Daily.  That is hard.  It is getting better.  Easier.  I am now looking for those words.  Another Friend of ours, at the gym, lifts by “our” mirror.  She says we always need to add #beautifulbadassbitches   For whatever reason, that feels right, too.

When we arrive and leave at the gym, it is dark – here is a picture of us practicing looking in the mirror…

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